August 31, 2001

Web review: Don't light my fire -- light my belly

Author: JT Smith

- by Tina Gasperson -
If you work in front of a computer screen all day, occasionally you get bored and feel isolated. Especially if you work at home. Sometimes you need to go offtopic. What better way to climb out of a rut, than to light yourself up. Fire up the Web cam, point it at your midsection, and show people what you're made of. Do a dance. Sing a song. Be different. Be you.

Hey, Halloween is coming up sometime in the next few months, and there's no time like now to get prepared. You'll beat the rush at Wal-Mart and Spencer Gifts, and besides, you might like these little gadgets so much you'll make them a part of your daily wardrobe. I'm talking about belly lights. Instead of going out and getting a ring for your belly, do something much less painful, much flashier, and much less permanent (unless you have a really deep belly button and the light gets lost) -- stick a tiny flashing light in there.

In case you don't know where to get a tiny flashing light to stick in your navel, well, we've got help for you. sells its Belly Lights online for a steal -- only $5.95 each. Don't worry about getting an infection, either. says that each belly light comes with hypoallergenic skin adhesive and something called "hydro foam." Oh, and batteries are included. I guess you could stick your belly light anywhere. Who says it's for bellies only? Stick it on your forehead, or on your cheek, or buy two and put one on each knee. The possibilities are as limitless as your imagination.

The folks at want you to have a fresh, hygenically acceptable light for your ears, so they make what they call "head lights." You get a pair of these for $14.95. Don't know why they're more expensive. If you're cheap, stick with the belly lights. Or, check out the "body lights" which run two for $7.95. These do not come with hypoallergenic skin adhesive, though, so watch out for fungus or something if you put them in the wrong place. They do have a tiny clip-on apparatus, which could come in handy for some parts of the body.

Then there are e-badges, e-watches, and e-shirts. Each of these has a "hypnotic display of moving lights" that are sure to delight your feline friends, inciting a playful response from even the laziest of cats. Just be careful where you stick those e-badges -- or make sure you have kitty declawed if you're not into blood and pain.

The most socially responsible offering from is the "bra"-veaux light. It looks like a string with a little flashing light pendant -- a necklace. They say it can be worn upon a bra by hooking each end of the string to your bra straps. Sure! Why be mired in tradition and hang it around your neck? Do something different. If you don't wear a bra, go out and buy one, for gosh sakes, and stick a bra-veaux light to it. After all, a portion of the proceeds from each sale are donated to the Breast Cancer Awareness fund.

Get out a credit card with some available credit, go to and get a stash.


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